Staying focused on the Lord
Since I was ten, my lifelong dream was to be a famous writer. I had dreams of financial wealth and use it for God’s people.
At 16 I was pregnant and married. In my mind, I had violated what I saw as God’s Laws. I fell into the trap of not being worthy to talk about hope. I had violated God’s Laws of defiance and adultery. I had two abortions so I ran from Him. The more I messed up, the less worthy I felt. The majority of my life was hidden in another closet and only a few select people knew much of my life’s story.
What made you decide to finally realize your lifelong dream?
I was drawn back to God. In 2009 I was 40 and pregnant with my tenth child. By this time I already had two abortions. I was literally on my knees praying to God to take my child and give it to someone else (I had already given another child to adoption). In the midst of this fervent prayer, I heard Him say, “Get off your knees. This baby is a blessing.”
My faith kept increasing through my church, Bible Study group and my desire to know Him. One day I created a Facebook page and began blogging without really knowing what I was doing. One year later, I published three books.
Did you face any obstacles?
A lot. When you start stepping into your purpose, the evil one steps up the attacks in full force and begins spiritual warfare.
I worked for my father and he was not thrilled that I was stepping away from my job to spend more time writing. My mother turned against me. But through all of that, I kept diving into God’s Word. When you are in your purpose and doing what you are supposed to, it doesn’t mean life is a dream. Life may become even harder. You are in the eye of the storm. You see chaos all around you but you experience peace. That calmness only comes from discovering who you are in Christ.
I walked away from a $1000 per week job. I had to get over the fear of trusting that God will provide. I always made sure that I was the provider for my family. Now I have come to love Him as my provider.
It was also very scary to put my mother and father out there. They were much of what I published in my stories.
What helped you get through them?
Reading God’s word. That’s what helped get me through. I have three “go to” verses:
Proverbs 3:5, Psalms 46:10 and Psalm 23. Sometimes fear was so overwhelming that I felt as though I was going to die.
Were there people that tried to discourage you?
I was concerned about what my mother might say. I was surprised to learn that during my childhood, she was the darkest, depressed person I had ever known. In the beginning, my husband was very much against blogging, which made it very hard. He thought I might stop if he raised enough ruckus about it. Now he encourages me, gives me time to write.
How did you feel when you finally accomplished your lifelong dream?
It felt incredible. I can’t put it into words. I self-published and had to teach myself how to do everything. I prayed for wisdom and He helped me through it. I gave away over 200 Kindle versions. If I never made another penny from anything I write, just knowing I reached out and helped other people is priceless.
What advice would you give to others contemplating finally living their dream?
Do it. Step out. Not doing anything is worse than doing something. I’ve had things thrown in my path. Sometimes it slows me down or halts me. I always have my focus on the Lord. In the midst of turbulent battles, which we always face when going after our dreams, there is always tomorrow. Whereas you may be stuck here, and you may be having a hard time today, tomorrow may be the best day of your life.
If you have a dream, go for it. Take baby steps. Do a little bit every day. Just as in losing weight, you may not be able to see it, but when you look back six months, you will see how far you’ve come.
Keep a journal, even if you write a snippet here and there. You don’t have to write a lot.
I am awed by the grace that God gives us every day. Sometimes you get a better view in the rearview mirror than you do when you are in the midst of it all.
To read about Wendy and her writing, click here.